Building Inspection Slogans We Haven't the Nerve to Use (Yet)

• If you want to pay peanuts, you'll get a monkey.
• Less expensive than a bad lawyer. More effective than a cheap therapist.
• It's hard to be the straight man at a clown show.
• Fast, cheap, competent (pick any two).
• If we don't find anything wrong, we'll break something.
• Don't be fooled again.
• Hated and feared by more realtors in the tri-county area.
• Will hug commodes for food.
• Next time it's perfect, or it's free.
• Real men don't get their work from realtor lists.
• A lot more realtors use us than recommend us.
• Even small buildings can have big problems.